How to know if you're making the right decision | MEL ROBBINS
6 Red Flags
“The urge to get something over with is often a sign something’s off-keel,” says Gina Ryan, an anxiety coach and mindful eating expert. Yes, we live in an age where instant responses are par for the course. But when we make a decision without taking time to process whether it’s something we actually want, we’re only inviting further confusion and unrest into our lives.
“It takes practice to break the habit of responding right away, but it really is just a habit,” Ryan says. Break it by requesting more time to think if someone’s pressuring you. (A simple “Let me think on that and get back to you” usually does the trick.)
The bigger the decision, the more time this might take, Carmichael adds. For example, set aside one week to clarify whether you want to apply to graduate school or change your career, another to research what program or field aligns with your interests, and another to factor in deadlines. “The sense of immediacy is good in a way, because it helps us to not get stuck in indecision—we just want to harness and manage it,” she adds.
Ask yourself, 'How would I feel about said decision 10 minutes from now, 10 months from now, and 10 years from now?'
Another way to combat urges to immediately act on impulses? Deploy the 10/10/10 rule, popularized by business writer Suzy Welch: Ask yourself, "How would I feel about said decision 10 minutes from now, 10 months from now, and 10 years from now?"
Keeping the future in mind helps you resist the allure of short-term rewards that don’t lead to lasting satisfaction, Carmichael explains—such as staying involved with someone who makes you feel insecure because you don’t want to feel lonely, or accepting a promotion without considering how it’ll limit quality time with friends and family.
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